I can't go a day without it. My thoughts return to it throughout the day, whether I'm at work or at home. I have a simultaneous love/hate relationship with it. I wish I could cut it out or go longer stretches without it. I know that it is bad for me when I don't use it in moderation. Sometimes I use it when I think my wife won't see me. Often I'll cut away from playing with my children for it. It controls me instead of the other way around more often than I'd like to admit. I crave more access to it. I continue to use it long after I know I shouldn't. I often feel powerless to it's grip over me.
I'm ashamed of these things.
(the internet)
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
my take on St. Patrick's Day
I am mostly Scottish. At least I think. At any rate that's the ancestry that I most identify with. Maybe that's why I like Braveheart, I think I might be the only one.
Scots aren't real big on St. Patrick's day. We like to wear orange instead of green. That tends to irritate some people. But there's at least one really good thing from Ireland. U2. They are the best. Today I will only listen to U2 in honor of good ole St. Patrick. because I really needed an excuse...
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
when I don't want to do something
At what point do you give up on a commitment? There are two opposing view points but neither seems right to me.
One perspective is that you should never give up on a commitment. The very meaning of the word implies that it's a pledge and one that should not be broken. There is much to this and we probably take our commitments far too lightly. But at some point it just becomes legalistic and void of grace.
The other view is that we should only do something as long as it's meaningful to us. This view says it's the heart that matters and being authentic with our actions. This perspective certainly steers clear of legalism but leaves us as weak creatures, ruled by our passions and not the will.
I have been struggling with a commitment I made a couple of months ago. It is a part of my weekly rhythm of life but I have begun to question it's meaningfulness. This week was perhaps the hardest week yet to follow through with it. I felt constantly bombarded leading up to it and during with thoughts and excuses for why I should give it up. It has lost some it's original purpose to me and began to feel like an empty ritual. And of course it's not convenient.
How do you make decisions like this of whether or not to carry through?
One perspective is that you should never give up on a commitment. The very meaning of the word implies that it's a pledge and one that should not be broken. There is much to this and we probably take our commitments far too lightly. But at some point it just becomes legalistic and void of grace.
The other view is that we should only do something as long as it's meaningful to us. This view says it's the heart that matters and being authentic with our actions. This perspective certainly steers clear of legalism but leaves us as weak creatures, ruled by our passions and not the will.
I have been struggling with a commitment I made a couple of months ago. It is a part of my weekly rhythm of life but I have begun to question it's meaningfulness. This week was perhaps the hardest week yet to follow through with it. I felt constantly bombarded leading up to it and during with thoughts and excuses for why I should give it up. It has lost some it's original purpose to me and began to feel like an empty ritual. And of course it's not convenient.
How do you make decisions like this of whether or not to carry through?
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